Dish With Fish: Random Babies

WELL, SHIT. HISASHIBURI DA NA. WE RANDOMLY DECIDED TO RANDOMLY FIX OUR BROKEN IMAGES AND RANDOMLY UPDATE AND ANSWER ALL THE RANDOMLY ASKED QUESTIONS WITH A RANDOM EPISODE OF DISH WITH FISH. IT ENDS... RANDOMLY.
~THE MANAGEMENT

Chocolate: *screeches*
Bishies who weren't awake before: *jump, blinkie and look startled*
Altair: Kuja-samaaaa! *claps*
Gateau: ^^;;
Knives: ... *gives Altair a weird look, since he's on the stage with the rest of them*
Kuja: *crosses his legs* ^.^
Vash: *playing pat-a-cake with One*
Kunzite: *yawns*
Zoisite: *giggling* Man, this is going to be fun.
Mirufi: *still looks manly but now in a more biseinen, less nearly unshaven sort of way*
Marron: *propping Carrot up in his chair*
Fisheye: *bounds up onto the stage* Hello, everyone, and welcome to Dish with Fish! I'm your stunning and fabulous host...
Tomo: *snorts, filing his nails*
Nuriko: *gooses him* Shh.
Tasuki: *gooses Nuriko* >:o
Marron: *hits Tasuki over the head with Carrot's sword*
Nuriko: ^^.;; Shh!
Fisheye: On today's episode, we're going to be talking about... *arches his fingers into claws, dropping his voice to a sinister level* -children-. *bounces and waves his microphone at the panel behind him* Of course, some of us here actually -like- children enough to sire a few without killing them!
Kenshin: *looks startled*
One: *clings to Vash's leg*
Zoisite: *snickergiggle*
Vash: *reproachful scowl*
Sano: *glare*
Fisheye: But why? And how? After all, this place is populated mostly by male-male couples. This is just the question raised by one of our viewers, and one that will be addressed by our panel today! But first we'll talk to someone who already had a whelp to raise when he got here. *winks and bounces over to Kuja and Altair*
Kuja: *swinging his gilt-booted foot*
Altair: *clueless blinkie*
Fisheye: Kuja-sama, if you could be so kind as to tell our audience a little something about yourself and your "little one..." *bright smile*
Kuja: *draws in a deep breath and then begins to talk in an unneccessarily breathy and seductive villain voice* As you all doubtlessly know, my -idiot- brother and I are genomes, genetically constructed beings, made specifically for grand scale destruction. My darling Altair is also a genome, although I made him myself.
Fisheye: *leans closer to him, licking his lips and wiggling his hips slightly* Is that so?
Kuja: *sultry smile* Yes. And I would warn you, he's very jealous, destructive, and without conscience, so you might want to watch the flirting.
Fisheye: ... *looks at Altair*
Altair: *gazes back at him with wide, placid eyes*
Fisheye: *shifts back slightly* I see... ah... You said you -made- him?
Kuja: Yes. I had the technology at my disposal and a lot of time on my hands. *strokes Altair's hair slowly* He's very special. *delighted pause* He's also very powerful, telepathic with dragons, and passionately hates my brother with all of his soul.
Altair: *coos and arches up into Kuja's touch*
Fisheye: *blinks* Always a delightful combination. *pause* You seem to have an -interesting- relationship...
Kuja: #^^# It's a little unorthodox, I suppose.
Fisheye: *drawls* Just a little bit, yes.
Altair: *frowns at him*
Kuja: *eyes Altair and pets his hair again* I don't care, quite frankly. He's the only person who's ever loved me.
Fisheye: *cradles the microphone against his chest* How sweet. Isn't that sweet? *gives the audience big sparkly gooey eyes*
Gourry & Tira: Aww!
Mirufi: ^^;;
Shuu: ~_~;;
Sh'ten: Ah, villain love. How convoluted and insane we all appear.
Rajura: It's true, though.
Naaza: We are pretty crazy. *twitch*
Fisheye: So I... take it you're pretty inseperable then? *purses his lips*
Kuja: Mm hmm!
Fisheye: ...damn. Oh well ^.^ And a charming pair the two of you are! NEXT. *stepping to Sanosuke and Kenshin*
Sano: *scowl*
Fisheye: My, but you -are- a big sexy hunk of man! *hops into Sanosuke's lap*
Kenshin: Oro? *blinkie*
Sano: #o_O# Uh...
Fisheye: So why don't you tell us about your -charming- little family? *running his fingers through Sano's hair* *heart*
Sano: -_-+ This is my... uh... Kenshin. Lover/wandering former serial killer. And our son, Souzou.
Fisheye: *arches a brow* Serial killer?
Kenshin: *shrugs*
Sano: Manslayer. Revolutionary. Very good at chopping up people into tiny bits with a sword. Like the one he's wearing. *points*
Fisheye: How intriguing! Who said that a family can't be created from violence? *giggle*
Kenshin: I am no longer involved in that kind of work, that is.
Sano: Yeah, he's retired. He mostly just knocks people out/cripples them for life now. If he has to. Sometimes he has to.
Kenshin: *cuddles Souzou against his shoulder and pats the baby's back*
Sano: And he does that. *heart* And cooks. God, can he cook. *dreamy expression*
Fisheye: So how did -you- get knocked up? *thrusts the microphone at Kenshin*
Kenshin: *blushes* Well...
Sano: *leer* He makes a beautiful woman? And they just ran with the idea. I mean, look at that -hair-. Mrph.
Kenshin: *laughs quietly* Sano...
Fisheye: ... *looks at the audience*
Gourry: Aww!
Mirufi: Aww!
Tira: Aww! *giggles*
Gabriel: They're boring! >:p
Sh'ten: I like his hair. Don't you, guys?
Anubisu: *rolls his eyes*
Fisheye: Well, you all are simply -darling- together... *slides out of Sano's lap and pretends to gag himself with the microphone*
Zoisite: That looks really dirty with that particular microphone.
Shuu: *having a snickerfit*
Fisheye: Honey, if I were really trying, I wouldn't gag on it. ^_~
Ryo: *blushing*
Shuu: *choke, wheeze* Oh my god... XD
Carrot: That's pretty hot...
Marron: ~_~;;
Mirufi: *murmurs something very dirty in his ear, then licks it*
Tenshi: (( which one? XD ))
Midgar: ((whaa? lol. marron. because he can.))
Marron: *turns red*
Carrot: *cackles* XD
Fisheye: And now... eh... one of our more interesting guests. *blinks at Suppi and Byakuen*
Mirufi: And then you. On the table.
Byakuen: *grooming a kitten*
Spinel Sun: Hello *lip lick* Fishie.
Fisheye: ... *clears his throat softly* So, ah, well, um... tell us about your family!
Spinel Sun: This is my mate. These are our cubs. We have hot, passionate big kitty sex when nobody is paying attention.
Byakuen: *purrs*
Fisheye: ... *backs away from a cub that is taking too much interest in his foot* Um... how... wonderful! How did you... who... hsst! Get away!
Spinel Sun: *makes a soft growly kitty noise and gets the cub to come back over to him and snuggle his leg* Hm?
Fisheye: *looking a bit frazzled* Who bore them?
Spinel Sun: Me, of course. He's -male-. I'm sexless.
Fisheye: Oh. *eyes Byakuen*
Byakuen: *licks his very large canines*
Spinel Sun: He's also a Siberian tiger. Weighs something like a ton. And only housebroken, he feeds himself.
Ryo: *sparkling at the cubs on the stage as if they were his own*
Fisheye: ... I see that.
Spinel Sun: *gestures to Ryo* And that's his pet magical boy.
Shuu: *snickers* Yeah, basically.
Byakuen: *makes a growly sound and shifts his weight slightly*
Fisheye: *backs away hurriedly*
Spinel Sun: *chuckles and runs his fingers slowly through Byakuen's hair* Mmm...
Fisheye: ... let's move on, shall we? *shudders and scoots closer to Vash and Knives*
Vash: *still playing pat-a-cake with One, although the game is slowly evolving into something on a strange and alien level of complicatedness*
Fisheye: *looks at Knives for a moment, then decides to not attempt clambering on him* Well, focus on you three! Members of our wider audience had specific questions about -this- little family group, as weird as it is. So what -is- the story with the kid?
Knives: I don't think I should have to answer any questions put forth by a lesser being. *sniff*
Vash: You never answer questions anyway. We can do it, can't we, One?
One: Yes! .^^.
Vash: Shoot, then, pretty boy! ^.~.
Fisheye: *sparkles at Vash* I think the audience members are wondering just where this darling little bundle of joy came from.
One: *giggles*
Vash: Well, she came from an idea. And then I think her backstory is that Knives made her to kill me. But she decided she didn't want to, and they fought all the time. Because she's not quite as silly as me, but she's not insane like a certain twin brother of mine who shall remain nameless.
Knives: *glowers*
One: *beams*
Vash: Or he made her to kill the rest of humanity and bring me home, I don't remember. She's precious though. And in this particular aspect, Knives was pregnant and gave birth to her. C-section or something, our biology is vague. Budding maybe.
Knives: Violent eruption.
One: Boom! *giggles*
Vash: Euugh! I don't know, I was somewhere else. He screams too much when he's in pain and likes to hurt me.
Fisheye: ... fascinating.
One: Gooey. .^^.
Vash: She likes crayons, donuts, naps, bathtime, and driving Legato as a personal slave. He likes that, too.
Legato: *asleep in the back row*
Fisheye: She's much bigger than these other children...
Vash: She can change ages at will. Although she never gets past puberty. She thinks breasts are inconvinient.
One: Bouncy. *frown, nod*
Vash: *grins*
Knives: *rubs his temples*
Shuu: Breasts -are- inconvinient.
Chocolate: M'used to mine. ^.^
Carrot: You'd -have- to be.
Chocolate: *leer* You could get used to them if you'd hold still.
Fisheye: Is there anything else you'd like to tell the audience? ^.^
Vash: I can't really think of anything. ^^.;; I've been interviewed more than once, so I feel kind of popular. How about you, One? Anything you want to say?
One: Better eat your Wheaties! .^^.
Ryo, Gourry & Tira: Aww!
Shuu: ()¬¬ OKay, I don't even want to start on the unlikeliness of that.
Knives: Who the hell taught her that?
Vash: I have no idea. ^^;;
Fisheye: She's just tooth-rotting, isn't she, folks? *heart* Moving on...
Tsuzuki: *wakes up suddenly, blinking around, and then notes his hand in Hisoka's lap and snatches it back with a tiny squeak of embarassment*
Hisoka: ...
Tsuzuki: *attempts to put his hand back in Hisoka's lap, having now thought about it*
Hisoka: ... *pretends not to notice*
Kunzite: *looks at Fisheye*
Fisheye: *quails*
Zoisite: *giggles* Kunzaito-sama, stop teasing him. He'll faint.
Kunzite: *sits back and folds his arms over his chest* I didn't do anything.
Zoisite: *giggles and offers him the baby*
Kunzite: *cradles Carnelian in his arms and smiles at him*
Carnelian: *impossibly wise baby smile*
Fisheye: *looking just slightly more relaxed* So, Zoisaito-sama, please tell us about your precious bundle of joy and wickedness.
Zoisite: Well, back during that business a few months ago or whenever when the girls decided to make everybody pregnant, Kunzaito-sama and I had a long talk about whether we wanted it cancelled or not, and decided we didn't. So now we have a baby. He's beautiful and brillaint and he's going to enslave the earth and kill the Sailor Senshi before he's even ten years old. *heart*
Fisheye: *squeals* Marvelous!
Zoisite: Of course! He is -ours-, after all, and we were two of the three greatest minds of the Silver Millenium.
Kunzite: *letting Carnelian squeeze his index finger*
Fisheye: He must be very smart.
Zoisite: He's a genius. He'd be potty trained, if he could walk. As it is, he just sort of lets us know. He's powerfully telepathic.
Fisheye: Astounding. *pause* Isn't One telepathic, too? *looks at Vash and Knives*
Vash: Yes. But it's a different sort of telepathy.
Fisheye: Ooh.
Zoisite: *ticking off on his fingers* Because Carnelian's isn't alien, it's magical. And he's also telekinetic, he could throw his toys without lifting his hand or fling a scantily clad teenage superheroine across a city without more than a nod. He's expressed an interest in pyrokinetics but we've asked him to refrain until his eyesight finishes developing.
Vash: Wheras we're extradimensional alien sources of incredible energy and we mainly use our telepathy for talking.
Kunzite: *kisses Carnelian's forehead*
One: Boom. *nods*
Vash: Yeah, we have other powers to use as explosives.
Fisheye: *points* And Altair can speak telepathically with dragons?
Kuja: Among other things. I don't quite know what he could do if he Tranced, although he's probably stronger than I, and I destroyed a planet and a half in Trance mode.
Altair: *giggles* Boom!
One: Boom boom!
Kuja: *chuckles* Boom, indeed. *heart*
Vash: *vaguely disturbed*
Knives: *looks intrigued*
Zoisite: *scribbles down 'Trance' on a sheet of notepaper*
Fisheye: And that ability is... biological?
Kuja: No. It's a learned technique I picked up from my idiot brother and his mismatched party of heroes.
Fisheye: How would Altair learn it?
Kuja: It's dangerously simple. One need only take damage or become overly emotionally excited. Both at once helps.
Fisheye: Hmm. Dangerous.
Kuja: Indeed.
Zoisite: *giggles* You're in a good mood, Kuja, you're being particularly villainous today.
Kuja: ^.^ I adore attention.
Altair: *rubs his cheek on Kuja's thigh*
Kuja: *caresses his hair*
Fisheye: It was Kunzaito-sama who bore the child?
Zoisite: Yes, actually.
Fisheye: A bit different from our other panelists, whose bodies, I think, were slightly more suited to the task.
Knives: -Very- slightly.
Zoisite: I think he handled it beautifully. He's in marvelous shape, you know. And I wouldn't have been able to handle it. Narrow everything.
Fisheye: *appreciative look* Too true. *heart*
Zoisite: He was even handsome and sexy when he was very pregnant. I'd have been a wreck.
Fisheye: Few can carry it off!
Zoisite: I know! I'm so lucky. *heart*
Kunzite: *gives Fisheye a cold look* Enough.
Zoisite: *pouts*
Fisheye: *backs off quickly, giggling nervously*
Nuriko: Are we winding it up, then?
Fisheye: Gee, I guess so! *quivering* Are there any last questions from the audience before we go?
Shuu: Did we get everything from the in-box, talk box thingy? Most of us are asleep, except for those not paying attention.
Tsuzuki: *mostly in Hisoka's lap*
Hisoka: *petting Tsuzuki and looking drowsy*
Rajura: *snuggled against Sh'ten, with Anubisu and Naaza draped over him*
Sh'ten: *murmuring romantic things under his breath*
Marron: *giving Mirufi blushing bedroom eyes*
Mirufi: *leering for all he's worth*
Fisheye: *flips through some papers on a clipboard* That was the only question I saw, besides requests for Kenshin and Rokou. There may have been more, but the porn spam got rid of them.
Shuu: Rokou and the Battousai are having sex up here. Or they were. *sweatdropping*
Battousai: *sleepy afterglowy cuddling*
Rokou: *flushed, hickeyed in places and embarassed, but very amiable to the cuddling*
Fisheye: During my -show-?? >:o
Shuu: Yeah. ^^;; There's some people groping each other up here, too, I mean, not a lot of people but uh- seein' all the um... good looking panel members gets people worked up or something, I dunoo. I mean, I wasn't.
Knives: ... *covers One's eyes*
One: *giggles*
Tsuzuki: *feigns innocence while still groping Hisoka covertly*